Existentialism, in which Holdiantor meets himself

Brian (2009 me): Have you ever noticed how Isiah Thomas's first name is spelled?
Elder Holdaway (1999 me): Huh?
Brian: Have you ever noticed the spelling of Isiah Thomas's first name? It shouldn't really be pronounced eye-zae-yah, it's more eye-zeeyah.
Elder Holdaway: Who are you?
Brian: I'm future you.
Elder Holdaway: No way. You're wearing a BYU tee-shirt.
Brian: Yep. I like to support my Alma Mater.
Elder Holdaway: Your what?
Brian: I graduated from BYU a couple years ago.
Elder Holdaway: But BYU's in Provo. You're supposed to be living in Orange County.
Brian: About that, um, nope. I have never lived in Orange County.
Elder Holdaway: Okay, then Venice, Santa Monica, or anywhere in Southern California?
Brian: (shrugs)
Elder Holdaway: What happened? Where are Spencer and Aaron?
Brian: Spencer is applying for PhD programs and Aaron lives out east and works for the government. I think he's considering law school.
Elder Holdaway: (head explodes)
Brian: Here, no, it's okay. You never answered my question about Isiah Thomas. It's one of those names that you'd just assume is spelled like the common English spelling of the Biblical Isaiah, but it's not. Weird, huh? Of course the English spelling is so far from the actual sound of the Hebrew name, I guess it doesn't matter how you spell it. It's nothing like the name Joshua, even though the two mean basically the same thing, and it would be kind of funny to name one son Joshua and another Isaiah, secretly knowing that you've named them the same thing.
Elder Holdaway: You're weird. Since when have you cared about Isiah Thomas?
Brian: Since I got The Book of Basketball for Christmas.
Elder Holdaway: The what?
Brian: It's a book by an espn.com writer all about the NBA.
Elder Holdaway: Who gave you that?
Brian: My brother-in-law.
Elder Holdaway: Chris?
Brian: No, his name's Jared. He's Jessica's younger brother.
Elder Holdaway: Jessica?
Brian: My beautiful wife.
Elder Holdaway: You're married?
Brian: And daddy to three little boys.
Elder Holdaway: Wow, your music career must have really taken off.
Brian: Um, I haven't played the drums in two years.
Elder Holdaway: (if head hadn't exploded earlier, well, you know)
Brian: (grins)
Elder Holdaway: So what else did you get for Christmas?
Brian: Stuff to decorate the sports room with. BYU stuff, Utah Jazz stuff, and a Colts' helmet decal. They were my fantasy defense for most the year, and treated me pretty well.
Elder Holdaway: I understood maybe half of that. You are 29 right, not 12?
Brian: Don't worry about it. You have ten years to figure it all out.
Elder Holdaway: I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm not sure how I feel about you.
Brian: You'll get used to me. You'll figure out how fun it is to be a little geeky about something, like memorizing the testimonies from Special Witnesses, and from there you'll get this insatiable desire to be around and read from those who are a little over-the-top in their obsession with .... really whatever.
Elder Holdaway: I've gotta go.

My Dad Did It

So why shouldn't I? Right? 

Wrong.

Insight

Mini #1 loves to play online games on pbskids.org. All the games are associated with a TV show on PBS. For the most part, these TV shows are educational and really good. 

But then there's this one:

I don't think he's ever watched the show on television, so he has no idea what it's all about. But he clicked on the game this morning and played one where he was supposed to give each of the characters an object, and then they would say thank you.

After giving the last object to the last ... whatever ... and it said thank you, he looked at me and said, "They sound sick."

I always knew Mini #1 was intuitive.

Needs a Better Title

A couple of years ago, when Mini#2 was born, I went to the mall to get J some things that would help her feel more comfortable in the coming months of post baby birthing.

It so happened that this one store in particular had the most comfortable of this one product, and so I went there and bought that product. They registered me in their system so we could get coupons and things in the mail.

Like the fool I sometimes am, I gave them my name instead of J's, so now two years later I occasionally get mailings addressed specifically to me with pictures of girls dressed in underwear and telling me that I can get free panties and/or a great deal on a bra.

This is probably the reason that whole Seminary teacher thing didn't work out...

Creepy, Just Creepy

The song with the worst music video ever is playing at my work right now.

"You Are Not Alone" by Michael Jackson

My skin is crawling.