Sunday, July 24, 2011

262 Things, in which I will list 262 things

1. I started this blog nearly four years ago
2. I had 2 children then
3. I have 4 children now
4. Joshua
5. Morgan
6. Jack
7. Lewis
8. I'm holding a sleeping Lewis with my left hand
9. I'm typing with only my right hand
10. This December will mark the tenth anniversary of the day Jessica and I met
11. Jack likes to laugh
12. A lot
13. Hysterically
14. Especially when he's tired
15. I thought the phrase "peachy keen" was "peachy king"
16. Until Jessica corrected me
17. Last month
18. I read a sports book for the first time in December 2009
19. The Book of Basketball by Bill Simmons
20. I just finished another sports book
21. Those Guys Have All the Fun
22. It's about the history of ESPN
23. Yup, I'm a geek
24. But if you know me, then you already knew that
25. I really like the cheddar cheese bagels from the Smith's (grocery store) bakery
26. Especially if they are still warm
27. When I was 15 I permed my hair
28. I can't remember why
29. But I was not the only guy in my school to get a perm
30. A kid much bigger, tougher, and cooler than me did too
31. After I did
32. But probably not because I did
33. The book I'm reading right now has a 348 page chapter
34. Our house has been infested with earwigs
35. Our boys are fascinated with earwigs
36. Those two things might be related
37. No, I don't personally know any of the Vineyard Holdaways
38. Or the orthodontist
39. Every pair of Joshua's pants gets a hole in the left knee
40. But never the right knee
41. My cell phone is a flip phone
43. I have had it for nearly two years
44. It has survived a lot
45. Especially a lot of falls
46. From my lap when I get out of my car
47. My car?
48. 1995 Chevy Lumina
49. White (did they make any other colors?)
50. It's missing large chunks of paint
51. Just like most of its siblings on the road
52. Its left front fender is bent out of shape
53. Because its tire blew up on the freeway one day
54. That was the only time in my life I had a police escort
55. I was in a band called Kermit
56. And one called The Bilge
57. And one called Rash
58. And one called Replace My Divot
59. And one called The Rasta Smurfs
60. And one called Cute Band Alert
61. And one called The Bob and Tom Show
62. And one called Eleven Seas
63. And others whose names I can't remember
64. Or they never had names
65. Oh! and a band that never practiced called Funny Little Finger Thing
66. I have a thing with loose teeth
67. I have heard medical personnel talk about putting patients on something called Rheummer
68. It turns out they were just saying "room air"
69. As in the patient is not on oxygen anymore
70. A number of my friends have law degrees
71. It's difficult knowing whether or not something I'm writing is really keeping with the spirit of my online persona
72. I have an online persona
73. I once introduced myself to someone as my online persona
74. Ten years ago I was on the last stretch of my mission
75. I served in Michigan
76. Specifically in Lansing
77. Jackson
78. Another part of Jackson
79. Grand Haven
80. North Muskegon
81. Harrison
82. The Mission Office in East Lansing
83. Okemos
84. And I served with Elder Hall (MTC)
85. Elder Staker
86. Elder Sanders
87. Elder Nelson
88. Elder Gregersen
89. Elder Merrit
90. Elder Henrie
91. Elder Ashby
92. Elder Peterson
93. Elder Olson
94. Elder Hatch
95. Elder Leavitt
96. Elder Anderson
97. Elder Boyle
98. Elder Munoa
99. Elder Eales
100. Elder Fagg
101. Yup, 17 companions
102. Elder Staker was my longest companion
103. We served together for 14 weeks
104. He is one of my friends who has a law degree
105. Our answering machine in our Lansing apartment as the source of great entertainment
106. I'm still typing this with only my right hand
107. Even though I took a break for a few hours
108. People are setting off lots of fireworks in our neighborhood
109. I used to be able to see the Timpanogos Temple from my front porch
110. I can't see it anymore
111. I think it's because trees have grown in the way
112. I start lots of things that I don't finish
113. There is a good chance I won't finish this list
114. Our yard is really big
115. A third of an acre
116. It seemed like a good idea at the time
117. Our sprinkler system is broken
118. Eye sore=my backyard
119. Jessica and I like to watch 30 Rock
120. And Burn Notice
121. And White Collar
122. I almost went to Toronto once
123. On accident
124. I wasn't the one driving
125. As a missionary, I came to love a breakfast of yogurt and bagels
126. That's what we ate at the mission home
127. I studied Hebrew in college
128. I should study Hebrew more often now
129. What is more often than never?
130. Lewis takes a bottle better than any of our other kids
131. I would look weird with a mustache
132. Few people wouldn't look weird with a mustache
133. Replacing a garbage disposal can make it seem like your dishwasher is broken
134. Unless you think to knock out the drain cover thing
135. The number 134 will always make me think of "I Believe in Christ"
136. Elder Staker used to read sections of Mormon Doctrine to me over the intercom of our phone
137. From one room in the apartment to another
138. Not long ago, cassette tapes were widely used for things
139. I looked like a little boy when Joshua was born
140. Josh was born in March 2004
141. So I was 23 when Josh was born
142. I was a little boy when Josh was born
143. My best estimate is that I taught somewhere around 1,000 missionaries in 2 1/2 years at the MTC
144. The audacity
145. In a lot of ways, I feel bad for Joshua
146. We just don't know what we are doing with him
147. At least with the other kids we have a small idea
148. Maybe just a slice of an idea
149. I think magazine subscriptions are funny
150. Not the subscriptions themselves, but the lengths to which magazines will go to get you to subscribe
151. I subscribed to Sports Illustrated to get a jacket
152. The subscription cost 20 dollars for a year, and that included the jacket
153. They want me to renew, but I'm not going to
154. I'm not sure which of us got ripped off
155. I am a big fan of morning sunlight
156. I am also a big fan of morning mist
157. And morning snowfall
158. I am now typing this using two hands
159. I learned how to type in high school
160. I am really glad I learned how to type in high school
161. I have three days off this week
162. Seagull is an extremely cool company, because we close our stores on a lot of holidays
163. Like Pioneer Day, we were closed on Monday in honor of Pioneer Day
164. I nearly accepted a job with US Bank
165. But instead, I accepted a job with Seagull Book
166. Sometimes I can be a smart cookie
167. I wonder when Tina Fey's character from 30 Rock is going to marry a Mr. Swindle
168. And fulfill her true calling as a painter of religious art
169. Tonight at Walmart it was curtains for me
170. And bread, milk, and dog food
171. And one of those lamps that you can clip onto a bed
172. Because Joshua likes to read in bed
173. He especially likes to read Garfield
174. I really liked reading Garfield as a kid
175. I had collected all of the Garfield books up to the current one in print
176. 20 years later, Jim Davis is still writing a daily strip
177. Wow, that's a lot of comic strips
178. I started this post six days ago
179. My favorite comic strip now is Dilbert
180. I understand there are some pretty good online comics
181. I can't get myself to be very interested in online comics
182. It's not that I can relate to Dilbert at all
183. I am not an engineer
184. I don't work in an office
185. My boss is fantastic
186. My employer (as in, Seagull Book) is just a great company
187. I rarely see more than one co-worker at a time
188. I attend meetings once, maybe twice a year
189. Though the meetings are 3 days long
190. But comparitively, I have no room for complaint
191. So, you see, my professional life is not at all like Dilbert's
192. My professional life is a little more like Jim's Journal
193. Jim worked at a copy store
194. At our house, we don't like thinking about what to eat
195. This makes meal time kind of hard
196. But we eventually find something
197. I don't like fruity candy very much
198. I like fruit, but I don't like sticky fingers
199. So I like to be able to wash my hands immediately after eating fruit
200. I think this supplement I'm taking expired in June of 2008
201. I bought it about a month ago
202. How is it that a supplement can expire?
203. I am the only person in my [parents'] family who has not been to Europe
204. The furthest away from Utah I have ever traveled is somewhere in Michigan
205. I say somewhere in Michigan, because I've been all over the lower penninsula
206. I don't know which of those locations is technically furthest away from Utah
207. I have not been back to Michigan since my mission
208. They (whoever they are) say you can't go back
209. I don't doubt that is true in my case
210. I could visit there, but it would be very different than when I was a missionary
211. Sunlight makes me happy
212. In 1999 I took a road trip
213. With Aaron and Spencer
214. We took Aaron's car
215. It was a brown Pontiac, or Oldsmobile
216. Or something like that, with a long bench seat in front
217. That's why we didn't take my car
218. A 1989 Mazda 323
219. We needed the bench seat in the front
220. Because all three of us sat in the front seat
221. In August
222. Driving to Phoenix
223. Without air conditioning
224. There was no working radio
225. Well, installed into the dashboard anyway
226. We had a working boom box
227. We played CDs in this boom box
228. And held it on our laps
229. There was a meteor shower on the way down
230. Oh, we all had to sit in front because our guitars and drums took up the trunk and back seat
231. Spencer had a blue mohawk
232. Aaron had pink hair
233. We made my sister really nervous when we showed up unannounced
234. This morning I stood in a breakfast buffet line across from Sheri Dew
235. She doesn't care for bacon
236. If you are still reading this, I apologize
237. My cell phone is no longer a flip phone
238. They call it smart
239. Baby Lewie is not very sleepy right now
240. I wish he was sleepy
241. We watched the Phineas and Ferb movie as a family tonight
242. It had some good moments
243. It was presented in "spectacular 2D"
244. That was one of its good moments
245. My left arm is falling asleep at the elbow
246. Another good moment was when Perry the Platypus peed on Dr. Doofenshmirtz's couch
247. And when Ferb actually said the words, "Well, he did pee on his couch."
248. I really like the smell of baking bread
249. And the taste of fresh baked bread
250. We don't have any flour to make bread right now
251. We are also out of potatoes, baby carrots, and orange juice
252. I need to go grocery shopping
253. That would also require making a shopping list
254. Let's see, beans, cheese, tomato sauce...
255. And diced potatoes (preferrably frozen)
256. Morgan didn't like the shredded potatoes I served him for breakfast this morning
257. I recently began writing with pencil
258. A classic yellow number 2 pencil
259. There is something very satisfying about that
260. I like eating refridgerated Twix bars
261. Especially the caramel ones
262. Though Peanut Butter Twix are my favorite candy bar

Jack's suggestion, in which he says this after eating the bread in Sacrament Meeting

I need butter.